Behind The Falling Man

“I thought I lost hope, but I found freedom.”

— Falling Man

I first heard about The Falling Man from a friend who’d seen his picture on the front page of the newspaper. The title immediately grabbed my attention and I wanted to know more. My friend explained how during the 9/11 attacks, this man was photographed as he appeared to be jumping to his death to escape the collapse of the World Trade Center building. This photo became infamous for the effect it had on people. It gave people the ability to connect with their innermost fears and also; their humanity. They saw themselves in The Falling Man. But what is even more miraculous out of this story is the story that would follow. The story of the miraculous recovery that resulted from the most desperate decision this man would ever make.

The Falling Man’s name is Paul Gillean Wade. He was born in Westbrook, Minnesota. I’m going to briefly touch on his background as Paul was not this mysterious character who fascinated everyone with his decision. No, Paul was an ordinary man who came from the mid-west and studied at the University of Minnesota to be an accountant. He had aspirations of being a woodworker like his father, but his parents encouraged him to take a direction that would be more financially stable for his future.

Eventually, Paul graduated and found work near home but he found himself dissatisfied. He wanted to explore and having taken the safe route most of his life, he decided to start looking for work outside of Minnesota. He was surprised when the first response he received was from a staffing agency in New York. He’d submitted a resume to a small company there but the agency wanted to match him with an opening at the World Trade Center. He immediately took the opportunity for the interview and shortly thereafter, landed himself a great new career in the heart of downtown New York.

His life would never be the same again. On the morning of the attack, Paul began his usual routine. He woke up and had a short workout before grabbing a breakfast bar and heading out to work. Nothing was unusual about the day, he saw the same people on the subway he usually saw, the air was just as dewy as usual, the sky just as clear as any other September day in New York. As he rode up the elevator to the 67th floor and thought about which flavor coffee he was going to have. He began to tire of the usual dark roast and thought he should switch it up. He got off the elevator and headed to his desk where he began to settle in. As he was pouring himself a cup of straight black coffee, he heard something startling. A crash? A loud boom. He thought it sounded as if a bomb had gone off and he rushed toward the window. He immediately saw what looked to be a fire at the building next door. Concerned, he rushed to his office to turn on the news to see what was causing the fire and if he should leave. The news mentioned that there was an accident with a plane and there didn’t seem to be cause for alarm but he went back to the window to watch the events unfold.

As all of his co-workers crowded around the window to watch, he drew back into his office. He no longer wanted to watch anyone suffer or be a part of what was now chaos on his floor. People grabbing their things and rushing to the elevators and stairs, he saw no point in fighting everyone if this was just a freak accident. He did keep the news on though, just in case they came up with new information that could be important for him being so close to the tower. He carried on catching up on some work that he’d left the night before when suddenly the entire floor beneath him began to shake and a sound so loud it knocked him to the ground rang in his ears. The ceiling above him started crumbling into dust and he gasped as he started to rise to his feet and fight his way to the window. Everyone ran passed and shoved their way to the stairs. As he ran to the window he knew this was it. This building would not last and he didn’t want to go down with it. He talked to his Mom, his sister and brother, and his Father. He thanked them and told them he loved them. He never looked down, he closed his eyes and prayed and smiled to himself. He knew what he had to do. His knees bent, his toes latched onto the shaking cement beneath him, his arms extended toward the wall next to him and finally, he simply let go. Of his fears, his anger, his pain, his anxieties – he was free. He was free falling. And as he continued down, he found a peace he’d never known before. The peace felt like a lightness. A light so bright that he had to open his eyes. As he opened his eyes he saw the most beautiful sunset he’d ever seen in his life. Suddenly, he wasn’t escaping anything, he was moving towards a feeling he could only describe as love.

Paul had never been able to find what everyone else seemed to find in life; love. He’d never had a romance or soul mate. He only ever loved his family but there was always a void within his soul that he struggled to cope with but now…this feeling. He’d never experienced such an immense feeling of wholeness. Paul was saved, he’d survived the most fearful, traumatic experience of his life somewhere between life and death. He finally found a place he felt loved entirely in but only after taking that brave jump of hope. He didn’t go down with the building, he never gave up.

So much more than just a scary and fearful image presented by some newspaper to get people to buy it, this image was a hidden tale of perseverance, love, and bravery. Maybe that’s the part of the picture people were really connecting to but their eyes were too closed with fear to see it. Open your eyes, sometimes you just have to take the chance and jump in order to really love.